The Library of Dust

Bang, bang, bang. "Let me in. Please, let me in! I need to see my daughter!" the anxious mother exclaimed. Tears ran down her face as she punded as hard as she could on the doors to the asylum. "Please. Please," she sobb-whispered. "Um, ma'm?" A blue uniformed man peeked his head around the side of the old building. "This asylum has been closed for 10 years now. No one has been here since then." He turned and started to walk away. His footsteps echoed from concrete sidewalk to concrete overhang. "Excuse me sir," the woman choked. "Who are you?" The man sighed and turned around. "My name is Manfred Bunnington. I was the janitor here once upon a time. I thought I'd give this place one last look before they knock it down next week." The mother gasped. "NO! Sir, uh, Manfred, um, Mr Bunnington? Can you please let me in? I need to find my daughter. I had a dream last night. She's here. God has guided me here.... I need to get in!" "Ma'm, your daughter isn't here. No one but you and me are here," Manfred said exasperated. "I know almost every patient that came and went here. If it's not too bold, what's your daughter's name?" "Sydney. Sydney Paige Matthews," the mother replied. Manfred's face went white. "I knew your daughter. I think she was the most brilliant here. Why did you send her here?" Manfred knew he had crossed the line, but he wantd to know. The woman looked away as a new river of tears made their way down her face. "I couldn'e stand it. She was my little girl. She was the sweetest, smartest, most athletic, just a parents' dream child. Then the car accident. Some drunk driver hit the side of the car that my baby was on. She was only 10. She had so much of her life that she needed to live. She couldn't talk right, walk right, or really think right after that. I was so devestated. I couldn't really look at her anymore. I loved her still, I still do, but it just didn't seem right. I thought this would be good for her. She could be social with people...like herself. Ashe wouldn't feel so left out." "Your daughter and I were good friends ma'm," Manfred said quietly. "Please, call me Cordelia." There was silence. Only the leaves rustled in the trees and the wind drifted by, carrying Cordelia's blonde hair. "I can show you the asylum Cordelia. I'll have to come with you, but I can get you in. I'll give you a little tour." Manfred opened the door with his handful of keys. "Manfred?" Cordelia asked as they entered the asylum. "My daughter came here 30 years ago. If this asylum closed 10 years ago, where is my daughter now?" Cordelia thought she knew the answer, but she wanted to confirm. It was Manfred's turn to tear up. "She died. When she was 20. 20 years ago. She wanted so much to go out and explore the world. Make new discoveries, travel. The asylum workers wouldn't hear of it. They had but 1 window in the whole place and it overlooked the ocean... her favorite thing in the world. Sydney spent all the time she could there. When she didn't have class or something else to do, she'd be at that window daydreaming, drawing, or writing stories and poetry. She was a phonomenal girl, full of passion and beauty. Her chesnut hair fell to her shoulders, and when the light hit it just right the halls sang. Her blue-green eyes matched the ocean, and the way he freckles sprinkled her nose and creme skin made her look like a porcelain doll. And that smile... Sorry, I'm rambling aren't I?" Manfred blushed and looked away. Cordelia had a nebulous look to her face, like she was thinking about 100 years ago. "She loved the ocean... Sydney did. She wanted to become a marine biologist and graduate from UC Santa Barbara. She never let me forget it. She loved the water in general, and the color blue. Blue and green. She did have a temper though. When she got angry, she was like a wave on a stormy day, with absolutley no control. You didn't want to be in her way at those times." By this time, the strangers were heading up a long flight of stairs. It was cold and dark in the old asylum. "Was it always this ominous here?" Cordelia inquired with a shiver. "I'm afraid that it was. As I told you before, there was only 1 window, and they never installed a hating system. But the people here lit up the plac with their smiles, and warmed it with their knowledge and love. It was a whole different place then. I can't believe the people here were treated the way they were. They were really no different than you or me, excpet for that fact that they didn't communicate in the same way. They were all wonderful people." His eyes were lost in thought. Cordelia couldn't find the picture Manfred described in her mind's eye, and frankly, she didn't want to. "Your daughter stayed here, in this room." Manny pointed a finger at a closed door. It hadn't been touched for so long that he had to kick it open. The door fell to the floor sending dust flying all over. Debris littered the floor and it crunched under their feet as the 2 walked. Cordelia looked around. At a far corner, she spotted something blue. She squinted at it, then rushed over. She wiped away the debris and picked up a little blue book. On the front "Sydney P. M" was etched. Cordelia oped the book to a crack and yellowed pages. Cordelia clutched her heart as she read the 1st entry.

January 13, 1967
Today was my first day of class. Mr.Manchester gave me this book. He said it'll help me deal with my emotions. He says that I get so angry because I keep my feelings in a bottle, and won't let nobody open it. I don't know what he's talking about. I don't even have a bottle. I miss my mommy. I don't why she let those peeple take me away. I failed her. She thinks I'm different, so she was disappointed and she didn't want me anymore. I'm sorry mommy. I didn't mean to embarrass you. I guess I'm getting what I deserve. The peeple here are nice. I like them. Espeshally Manfred. He is my first frend. Lord, please be with me as I spend my days here. I don't think mommy is going to pick me up.
Sydney P. M

Cordelia flipped through some more pages until she found Sydney's 16 birthday. She read:

March 13, 1975
Today is my 16th birthday. So what? I'm no different, just older. I'm the shortest of all the girls here. They tease me. No one is nice to me. Ecsept Manny. He's my bestes frend... I love him with all my heart. And you too God. No one can take your place. I don't like the way I am. I don't want to be here. I'm not that different, really. I want to explore. I can write better than I can talk. It's not fair, it's not fair! I have no where to go. No frends. Nothing. No one, not even my family want anything to do with me. I hate you mom! For making me come to sucha terruble place. You're not my mom no more! Wait, the voices, they're back. They tell me to kill Manny. Can't control hands and feet, can't talk no more. What happening? They're coming. The people are coming! I gotta go, get outta here. I'm not crazy! NO! Help! Leave me alone-

Cordelia slammed the book shut and dropped it. She couldn't stand to read what the crazy workers here were doing to her daughter."I'm such a terrible person. I didn't know asylums were bad. I thought it would be good for to be with other people like herself. I guess, I was wrong. In so many ways." Cordelia sighed a deep sigh and cried in her heart. She didn't want her daughter's lover to see her in such a way as this. "There's one more thing I think you should see." Manfred spoke suddenly from behind Cordelia's back. She jumped. "Sorry. Just follow me. Be careful though. There's stuff all over." He helped Cordelia up and led her out the door and down a long corridor with stairs. When they had reached the end of their journey, they came up upon a door. Manfred opened it with a creak. Cordelia walked in. She was surrounded by shelves of copper cans. "What is this?" Cordelia asked Manfred. She felt life buzzing all around her. "This is the 'Library of Dust'. That's what I call it anyway. It's everyone who went here, that died here without a family member to claim them. I wouldn've taken your daughter, but I'm not family. Sydney is here. I've looked time and time again, but I could never find her. Maybe you can." Manfred was very hopeful. "I swear, if I would've known about my daugher, I would've come to get her." She had already begun to search through the cans. Each one was a little different on the outside, and she could feel personality and life on the inside. After an hour of searching, they both grew weary. Cordelia was at the second to top shelf, the last row of cans, and Manfred wa somewhere on the other side. She came accross a can that was blue, green, white, drak blue, and gray; A can that perfectl resembled a wave. She felt her daughter. "Manfred! Manfred I found her!" Cordelia exclaimed, cradling the can like a new born baby. Manfred rushed over. He knew instantly that it was Sydney. The 2 people, who were strangers just hours before, now felt like they were old friends. They knew that Sydney was still alive in their hearts, that she's planned for this. They cried and cried. They left the asylum and brought Syney with them, down to the ocean. They sprinkled her into the ocean. "To our Sydney,"Cordelia whispered as a tear ran down her cheek. The 2 hugged, and then went on their way.

100 years later
"Let's go to Hollister. I need some more shirts," exclaimed Amanda. All the girls in the group nodded and clapped in reply. "Let's go then girls." A girl with chestnut hair and blue-green eyes was left at the back. Gina had Cerebral Palsey, so it was hard for her to control her muscles, even her mouth. She knew things, but it was difficult for her to communicate with others. "What about Gina?" A girl in the group asked Amanda. "Just leave her, she's weird anyway. How, again, did he get into our group?" The alpha snapped tartly. "She has no friends, so I invited her." "If you want to stay my friend, don't do that again!" Amanda whisper-screamed. The girls sped up and left Gina. 'Wait! Wait you guys! I... can't...go...that...fast.' Gina thought sadly as her friends were almost out of sight, and they didn't even know she was gone. She plopped sadly down on a bench. She turned her attention to the little patch of dirt next to her, and spotted something blue. She picked up a little blue book the color of the ocean that had "Sydney P. M" etched into it. Gia opened the book to a crack and yellowed pages, and read.

For more info on this topic, go to http://www.ross-ed.org/ and click on 'Library of Dust'.